Ghengis_John
[13] Hero
Incoming hate. So much hate.
Priest is just an awful movie. I knew it was going to be cheese, I expected cheese and while I wanted to salute the movie's cheese at a few points all and all it was too terrible for me to do so. You know that it's not going to be an A list movie, but it really let me down in that it didn't even manage to be fun. It wasn't even fun to make fun of. There is zero character development, there isn't enough substance to the fights for those to stand up on their own, the plot is just stupid and non existent and makes no sense, the stylish elements are not strong enough to be cool and it's clear from the opening somebody half-wished this to be an anime but the funding for that didn't come in. (It almost succeeds in that however because I am reminded of some of the worst animes that I have seen.)
So many things bothered me about this movie. Nobody in the movie has a name besides "Lucy", the authorities seem oddly unwilling to kill vampires after just fighting a 2000 year long war against them, the city is a bad rip-off of Judge Dredd's which itself was a bad rip-off of Blade Runner's, there's probably fifteen minutes of dialogue in the whole film (I hope you like watching people driving bikes across the desert though because there's a lot of that) and I have no reason to care. Priest is a stupid, awful movie that insults the watcher's intelligence at every turn. If the opportunity ever presents itself do yourself a favor, do not watch priest. Not even out of curiosity. There are some times curiosity is bad. Like sticking a fork in a light socket, watching Priest is a bad idea.
As a general rule of thumb after this and the KOF movie just avoid anything starring Maggie Q, new rule. And it has the gall to set itself up a sequel. Come on guys, did you watch your movie?
I can't decide if the movie had more driving across the desert or poorly lit shots in crampt, dark tunnels. As an added bonus, there's a train full of vampires that's driving across the desert that's BOTH AT THE SAME TIME!
There was one and only one good thing about Priest and that was a one minute long bit of Sergio Leone-esque music. That's all. I can't even say the sound track was good, since it spends half the film ripping off Predator.
Come to think of it. There was not one joke in that entire movie. Besides the movie itself. What kind of movie doesn't have one joke in it? Me and my brother were trying to remember one joke. We couldn't. And what really sucks is I just saw a Jimmy Stewart western made 70 years before priest that was a far better movie. PRIEEEEST! I HATE YOU! NOTHING CAN MAKE THIS RAGE GO AWAY!!! GYAWARRRRAWWWRRRRAAAAGH! *heart explodes*
Was this worse than KOF? I don't know...
Priest is just an awful movie. I knew it was going to be cheese, I expected cheese and while I wanted to salute the movie's cheese at a few points all and all it was too terrible for me to do so. You know that it's not going to be an A list movie, but it really let me down in that it didn't even manage to be fun. It wasn't even fun to make fun of. There is zero character development, there isn't enough substance to the fights for those to stand up on their own, the plot is just stupid and non existent and makes no sense, the stylish elements are not strong enough to be cool and it's clear from the opening somebody half-wished this to be an anime but the funding for that didn't come in. (It almost succeeds in that however because I am reminded of some of the worst animes that I have seen.)
So many things bothered me about this movie. Nobody in the movie has a name besides "Lucy", the authorities seem oddly unwilling to kill vampires after just fighting a 2000 year long war against them, the city is a bad rip-off of Judge Dredd's which itself was a bad rip-off of Blade Runner's, there's probably fifteen minutes of dialogue in the whole film (I hope you like watching people driving bikes across the desert though because there's a lot of that) and I have no reason to care. Priest is a stupid, awful movie that insults the watcher's intelligence at every turn. If the opportunity ever presents itself do yourself a favor, do not watch priest. Not even out of curiosity. There are some times curiosity is bad. Like sticking a fork in a light socket, watching Priest is a bad idea.
As a general rule of thumb after this and the KOF movie just avoid anything starring Maggie Q, new rule. And it has the gall to set itself up a sequel. Come on guys, did you watch your movie?
I can't decide if the movie had more driving across the desert or poorly lit shots in crampt, dark tunnels. As an added bonus, there's a train full of vampires that's driving across the desert that's BOTH AT THE SAME TIME!
There was one and only one good thing about Priest and that was a one minute long bit of Sergio Leone-esque music. That's all. I can't even say the sound track was good, since it spends half the film ripping off Predator.
Come to think of it. There was not one joke in that entire movie. Besides the movie itself. What kind of movie doesn't have one joke in it? Me and my brother were trying to remember one joke. We couldn't. And what really sucks is I just saw a Jimmy Stewart western made 70 years before priest that was a far better movie. PRIEEEEST! I HATE YOU! NOTHING CAN MAKE THIS RAGE GO AWAY!!! GYAWARRRRAWWWRRRRAAAAGH! *heart explodes*
Was this worse than KOF? I don't know...
