I feel for you DEX. More often then not it's the nice guys who finish last.
The good news is, the older you get, the less women (and people in general) care about superficial shit.
Unfortunately I don't really have an answer for you as to how to get people to love you (and not in the gay way, I mean friends who will be there for you when you need it most). It's taken me almost 40 years to figure out why people generally don't like me, because it always seems to be for different reasons every time.
And then you have some friends who call you a friend but never want to hang out. They always say their busy, and they never call you, it's always you calling them.
Maybe at one point they actually considered you a worthy friend, but somehow you fucked that all up.
One thing I DO know, is that if you provide entertainment for people, they will gravitate towards you more. This could be anything from being the life of the party to a person who invites them on ski trips. If you are people's connection to a good time, they will call you their friend for life.
On the other hand, if you are depressed and angry at the world like me, and loudly voice your opinion of how screwed up the world is, people don't want to hear it, even if deep down they agree with you.
It's shitty that when you're depressed you have to keep it to yourself, when sometimes you want nothing more than to get it off your chest and talk it out. Trust me, I know that feeling all too well. That was actually the reason why my wife divorced me, because she said I was too depressed at life and was a drag to be around. Of course this only made me even more depressed.
It's times like these that I go buy a bottle of booze and drink myself retarded. I can't figure out why people don't like me any more than you do, and I'm much older than you. Take comfort in the fact that you're not alone is all I can really offer you in terms of solutions.
I will be here whenever you need me.