Jokes thread

[Lasercakes]

What happens when a Jew with an erection runs into a wall?

He breaks his nose.

 

[Tenchi8]

Sophitia with a dildo for a joke weapon as she stabs down on her defeated victims repeatedly. XD

I just had to share that one, at least once. XD

 

[spongebob]

http://sickipedia.org/

 

[Juez]

alright so 3 guys walk into a bar, the first guy walks up to the bartender and says "hey barkeep, gimme a jack an coke" bartender does it. The second guy walks up to the bartender and says "yo gimme a shot whiskey" bartender does it. The third guy goes up to the bar and says "I'll have a glass of water" the bartender gives him the water, and they all lived happily ever after. The end?

 

[spongebob]

3 guys are in a cafe, one says: I’ve got the smallest arm of the world! Another says: I’ve got the smallest head of the world! The last one says: I’ve got the smallest dick of the world!

The 3 guys go to Guinness World Records. The first one goes first and returns happy: I’ve really got the smallest arm in the world! The second returns happy too: I’ve really got the smallest head of the world!

The last one returns angry and screams: Who the fuck is Justin Bieber?!??