Jokes thread
- Thread starter Blade_edge
- Start date
BlackDragon37
[12] Conqueror
My wife was choking on my cock last night.
Doesn't sound impressive until I add that I was doing her up the ass.
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It's amazing how many carrots fit into a girl's ass when you promise to match it in diamonds...
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How many members of the BBC does it take to change a lightbulb?
None - they prefer things to be left in the dark.
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If the rumours of Justin Beiber smoking weed are true, he'd finally have something in common with a musician.
Doesn't sound impressive until I add that I was doing her up the ass.
---
It's amazing how many carrots fit into a girl's ass when you promise to match it in diamonds...
---
How many members of the BBC does it take to change a lightbulb?
None - they prefer things to be left in the dark.
---
If the rumours of Justin Beiber smoking weed are true, he'd finally have something in common with a musician.
Hot Rod Dave
"Saucy saucy minx"
^I effin love you man
BlackDragon37
[12] Conqueror
"It's so pathetic I have to fake my orgasm with my husband to make him feel more comfortable as a man. Why do men have to have such fragile egos?"
Asked the woman in 3 inch heels with the fake tits, bright red hair and too much makeup.
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Jimmy Savile is accused of 416 attacks, 34 rapes, with victims aged 8 to 47 and there were 7 chances to stop this pervert.
He may have been a sick cunt, but he has helped me with my numbers for tonight's Lottery.
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A 17 Year old boy has been accused of raping a 14 year old girl.
Or as it is known at the BBC, Work Experience.
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What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim?.
Who the fuck cares? More bacon for me!
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Mike and Bob are swimming when they see a pregnant woman drowning.
They quickly pull her to safety.
Mike starts giving her mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
Bob takes off the woman's panties and puts his mouth on her pussy.
Mike says, "THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?"
Bob replies, "You save the mother, I'll save the child!"
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Hard to believe that another woman has been gang raped on a public bus in India.
Surely at least one of the other 674 passengers could have prevented it?
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Justin Bieber: "I was offered a part in the 50 Shades of Grey movie."
Now I haven't read 50 Shades of Grey, but I highly doubt Mr. Grey was a melodramatic teenaged faggot.
Asked the woman in 3 inch heels with the fake tits, bright red hair and too much makeup.
---
Jimmy Savile is accused of 416 attacks, 34 rapes, with victims aged 8 to 47 and there were 7 chances to stop this pervert.
He may have been a sick cunt, but he has helped me with my numbers for tonight's Lottery.
---
A 17 Year old boy has been accused of raping a 14 year old girl.
Or as it is known at the BBC, Work Experience.
---
What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim?.
Who the fuck cares? More bacon for me!
---
Mike and Bob are swimming when they see a pregnant woman drowning.
They quickly pull her to safety.
Mike starts giving her mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
Bob takes off the woman's panties and puts his mouth on her pussy.
Mike says, "THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?"
Bob replies, "You save the mother, I'll save the child!"
---
Hard to believe that another woman has been gang raped on a public bus in India.
Surely at least one of the other 674 passengers could have prevented it?
---
Justin Bieber: "I was offered a part in the 50 Shades of Grey movie."
Now I haven't read 50 Shades of Grey, but I highly doubt Mr. Grey was a melodramatic teenaged faggot.
BlackDragon37
[12] Conqueror
Good on Lance Armstrong for finally having the ball to come clean.
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Jeremy Kyle - "Benefit scroungers make me sick!"
Phillip Schofield from This Morning - "A nation on benefits is no nation at all."
Loose Women - "It's about time Britain got working and stopped sponging!"
...they say to their target-audience of single mums, OAP's, and those held at Her Majesty's Pleasure.
---
So long HMV, you will be missed.
DVDRIP.
---
Jeremy Kyle - "Benefit scroungers make me sick!"
Phillip Schofield from This Morning - "A nation on benefits is no nation at all."
Loose Women - "It's about time Britain got working and stopped sponging!"
...they say to their target-audience of single mums, OAP's, and those held at Her Majesty's Pleasure.
---
So long HMV, you will be missed.
DVDRIP.